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Monday, September 30, 2013

Surreal

Three and a half years ago (January 25th, 2010,) Ian and I arrived on campus for a two month long training conference before we moved overseas.

Three and a half years ago we had been trying to conceive for nearly 8 months, without success.

Three and a half years ago I spent two months longing and yearning for a child. Every day I would walk behind families with babies and dream of the day when Ian and I would go from a couple to a family.

I would open doors for moms with strollers and procure high chairs in the cafeteria. I pulled off puffy snow coats and clipped together mitten pairs in the coat rooms for families with more kids than there were parents. I babysat for families so they could have date nights. I took hundreds of pictures of children to give to their parents so they would have a good portrait. And I ached, oh I ached, when my friend would slip out of a training to go nurse her infants son.

I wept at the difficulty of getting pregnant. It was so hard.We seemed to be getting no where.

I smiled and hid tears when friends announced their pregnancies and families who we were sharing life with on a daily basis grew right before my eyes.

Today, almost four years later, I stepped foot onto that very campus again.

This time, I had a toddler in front of me and a yearling in my arms. I had to wrangle them through registration and procure our own high chairs in the cafeteria. I balanced three food trays and got straws for cartons of milk.

And I smiled through it all. Because never, in my wildest dreams would I have thought up my family. I never could have picked out a more perfect fit than Grace and Sophia. God's timing in bringing them into our lives was perfect.

It wasn't easy. We had no family around for either of their infancies and Sophia's silent reflux made her first five months torturous, but it was perfect nonetheless.

I was brimming with tears all day and kept turning to Ian saying "Can you believe we are here? Don't you remember the last time we were here? We have TWO babies now!"

I am so thankful that my plans for my life aren't followed, and that instead my Author has His way and can create the most beautiful of stories. I pray that it will bring Him glory one day.

Every night, before the girls go to bed we sing "Gracie's song."

Really, it is just the Doxology, but both girls clap their hands and Gracie can belt out the song to the best of her abilities. I hope they know that they are a blessing, and that we praise God for them every day.

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

-Thomas Ken

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17

 

3 comments:

Tami said...

This is such a beautiful post, Brittney! God has definitely created the perfect family for you and I love that you cherish it and realize what an amazing blessing you have been given.

Emily said...

This brought tears to my eyes. So sweet! Also, love the pumpkin picture! :)

Lauren said...

what a beautiful post! God certainly does some amazing things!